


day 1: choosing each other

by Sang_argente



Series: wincest love week 2016 [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Weechesters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-02-15
Packaged: 2018-05-20 17:23:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6018310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sang_argente/pseuds/Sang_argente
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>the first time dean chooses sam, it's not even really a choice. </i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	day 1: choosing each other

the first time dean chooses sam, it’s not even really a choice. he’s four years old and baby sammy has been home for almost a month. dean doesn’t really know what to think of him; he cries all the time and it makes mommy cry when she can’t get him to stop. daddy hasn’t been that happy either, even if he doesn’t cry. to be honest, dean kind of feels like crying too and he just needs to do something so the next time sammy starts crying, dean goes into the nursery even though he knows he’s not supposed to.

mommy’s head has been hurting all day so dean tries to hurry, not wanting sammy to wake her up. he shuts the nursery door and hurries over to the crib, shoving an arm between the bars and clumsily petting sammy’s hair.

“ssshhh, sammy,” dean whispers, freezing in place when the tiny head under his fingers turns toward him. he runs his fingers through sammy’s soft curls when he starts to whimper and smiles when he starts cooing instead.

“that’s better,” dean says and matches sammy’s gummy smile with one of his own. “see? it’s okay. you’re okay, sammy, because i’m here and i’ll take care of you.”

it’s been maybe twenty minutes and his arm is starting to get tired but he can see the frown curling at sammy’s mouth and worries. soon, sammy’s whimpering again but dean’s petting isn’t doing anything to stop it. when little tears start to build in sammy’s eyes, dean can feel his own getting a little wet. he doesn’t want sammy to cry, he wants him to be happy, all the time.

“it’s okay, dean,” mommy says and dean turns to see her standing by the door, a soft smile on her face. “sammy’s just hungry. why don’t you go play while i feed him?”

“no,” dean says, stubborn. “i want to stay with sammy.”

after the fire, after daddy puts sammy in his arms and tells him to take care of him, dean holds sammy close to his chest and looks up with determined green eyes, much too old for his young face, and says, “i already do.”

but dean doesn’t know that while he’s taking care of sammy and making sure he’s happy, sammy-sam- is following him around, watching his big brother with sad eyes, knowing that no one is taking care of him.

and that’s how sam chooses dean. he chooses him with every cereal box prize and cheap army man. he chooses dean when he doesn’t complain about moving again, knowing that fighting with dad makes dean sad. he chooses dean when he practices with the knives and guns instead of doing homework, knowing dean wants him to be as safe as possible in this life they live.

he chooses dean nine times out of ten, young enough to still want some things for himself, young enough to still be a little selfish.

but when he slams the door behind him, cheeks flushed and eyes wet and hands shaking, and heads to california, he’s still choosing dean. he’s just choosing to keep dean safe this time, safe from this sickness that’s been growing inside of sam, knowing that dean would do anything to make him happy. and he doesn’t want that.

so he chooses dean, and leaves.

**Author's Note:**

> this is the first of seven submissions i made for wincest love week. like what you see? check out my [tumblr](http://stilesthesasswolf.tumblr.com).


End file.
